Caitlin's College Blog

By: Caitlin Emmons

College is supposed to be the best time of your life, one on going life
changing experience, right? That is what every college advisor told me
during the various presentations I went to. Each one told me their
school had something else to offer, something that would make me a
more complete person. What I didn't
know then is that I would not end up
where I thought I would be made whole.
I ended up choosing the school that I
thought of as my last resort safety school,
University of California, Santa Cruz.

It wasn't that this school was bad or not
good enough, I just never thought it was
me. Actually that is sort of a lie, during
most of my college application process I
comforted myself by thinking I would
never end up going to Santa Cruz.
However, once the rejection letters started rolling in, I thought more
and more about my options. This isn't to discourage you from applying
to your dream schools, for me it just didn't work out as planned. But life
isn't really about what you planned is it? That's why I am writing this
column, because too many of us plan everything without ever thinking
about how the plans might change. These writings will document my
first year of college, the ups and the downs. So let's get started, shall we?

It's August, August of my last summer as a
“high schooler” even though I graduated
almost 2 months ago. I never thought I
would get here, this summer seemed like it
would keep going on forever and ever, but
like everything it is coming to and end. My
friends are beginning to pack for school. I on
the other hand still have a month and a half
here. But that doesn't really matter when
everyone around you is leaving. By the time
this issue is published, the girl I have been
closest to for almost 10 years will be
spending her last day in Claremont. Shortly
after that, a handful of friends will move
into their dorms at Berkeley. The east coast
kids will follow soon after. And then it will be me, and the rest of us on
the quarter system. (College Lingo break down #1: Schools operate on
either semesters or quarters. At a school that is on semesters you will
have two sessions, generally with an optional summer session. At a
school that is on quarters (like Santa Cruz) you will have three shorter
sessions with an optional summer session. There are pros and cons to
both but we'll get there in another issue).

This summer has made me realize how important high school was to
many of my friendships. It becomes pretty apparent when you are
sitting with a  bunch of people and no one can think of anything to say,
until someone brings up something you had in common during high
school. Of course, I still have friends that can survive without high
school, but it isn't always easy. I got lucky, sort of, because my best
friend was a year ahead of me, it made the whole suddenly not having
thirty million friends thing a lot easier. What you should learn from my
experience is this; don't be afraid when your social circle is suddenly
substantially smaller. You stay friends with people after high school for
a reason and this is the time to figure that out. Don't force yourself to
hang out with people you no longer have anything in common with
because it is what you are used to.

This is when branching out becomes necessary. We are lucky enough to
live in the era of Facebook and Myspace. Once you know where you are
going to school join the school's network and start friending people you
are going with. Some people will never meet half the kids they friended
the summer before college, but sometimes things work out. I am one of
the rare cases where things really worked out. The people I have met
through Facebook and AIM are already some of my closest confidantes.  
Don't worry about feeling like a creeper when you start to look at these
kids and wonder if they could be your friend, everyone is doing it,
seriously. Also, don't be nervous about friending people. If they reject
your friend request they are probably socially inept, and I mean those  
aren't  really the people you want as friends, are they?

There is a theme to this entry and it's friendship, both old and new.
Remember the adage “Make new friends, but keep the old, for one is
silver and the other is gold,” it sort of applies here, except that it implies
your old friends may be worth more, in some situations this is true.
However, I think it is important to remember that people all give you
something different and from them you take something else as well.
This doesn't mean some are worth “less,” just that they have something
else to offer. This is one of the weirdest transitions you are ever going to
have to make, many of us have been surrounded by the same people for
years, and now suddenly you are about to be thrown into a world full of
new people, who come from entirely different backgrounds. But don't
forget you all chose the same school, that's something you have in
common already.

I hope this column provides you all with something, maybe a laugh at
my misadventures, maybe a lesson to learn from my mistakes, and
maybe a little faith that while things don't always follow the plan, the
universe tends to unfold as it should.
Editor's Note: Caitlin Emmons will be a freshman at the University of California at
Santa Cruz in the fall. This is the first of a monthly blog Caitlin will write about her
experience being at college.